Why don't you rescue me?
Even as I type I know that answer. I have seen what my good intentioned rescue attempts have done for my children. I believe it cripples them when I do everything for them. On the other hand, it empowers them when I allow them to try, whether they succeed or fail.
The very act of trying builds determination and confidence. It fuels a sense of self and a sense of accomplishment. If they succeed, they have gained knowledge and ability that will be useful throughout their lives and when they fall, it is important to be there to help pick them up so they can try it again and even still, they gain knowledge that will be useful later.
Perhaps this is where I feel You have abandoned me. Maybe I feel as if You are not helping me pick myself up. I need You to help me put the pieces back together again. I have fallen and each time I begin to rise something else knocks me down. Help me put this mess I call my life back in some semblance of order.
In my head, I know You would not abandon me. In my heart, I wonder where You are and why You are keeping Your distance. I know You are there. Why won't You engage?
With the photos above, I am considering that maybe I haven't fallen, but am trying to escape the fear that is binding me. Is that what You are trying to tell me? Are my wings not strong enough, yet?
I sure wish I had more clues so I could figure this out.
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